While I was at the office this morning trying to clear my email, she SMSed me, asking about the kids. I told her that the kids are OK. Then she said she missed them. I suggested then she should be back in the evening to see the kids. Then I told her that I will be booking two rooms at sentosa for the coming school holiday and invited her to join us if her schedule permit. She was non-committal. Then I told her about the kids - I mean, the real truth as this morning, the little one was not her usual self. I sent her this SMS: "This morning A held on and refuse to let me go toilet or do anything. Only I can carry her. Felt so close to her and love her so much. Made me realized that the children are so important to me. So I have finally decided to let you go. We won't be happy. Finally I understand the meaning of love" My eyes were a bit moist as I sent the SMS but I felt so good - the best feeling I had for more than a month. I felt a sense of relief. Life suddenly seemed so beautiful. We did not SMS much after that as I needed to work. It was a long day of work - the meetings stretched right through 8pm. When I got home she was there, coaching the children with her homework. And now the little one was very sticky towards her - refused to let her go and wanted her to carry all these while. We spoke briefly and I was glad that I felt nothing - it was almost unreal - feeling nothing for this woman of my life, this woman that had shared a good part of my life. And then she left. And I was left to be on my own looking forward to the days ahead.