The Final Cut

"Finally, I understand the feelings of the few ashes and diamonds foes and friends we are all equal in the end pink floyd" This will officially be my final writing here. It has served its purpose and it had allowed me to express myself - my highs and lows - the emotional journey that I had travelled to arrive at what I am today. I know what I am going through is probably very insignificant to the world at large - with the tsunami disaster, with the conflicts still in the middle east, or even to the poor and unfortunate we have here in singapore. But still it is a personal tragedy for me, it does not stop the world from spinning but it did stop my world from spinning regularly and correctly. The sun still rises in the east but to me it is a different sun. From a different perspective, I am still very much a fortunate being and rightly so I should be savouring on what I have rather than focusing on what I have lost. I have gone through all these, I know what I should be doing and how I should be moving but at the end I am still me. I am still being entangled by this web of emotions that may from time to time invade my sense of being. But I know, the downs are getting lesser and lesser and perhaps only time can really heal this wound. I am not running away. As I said, happiness is a choice. And everyday I can choose to be happy or sad. Most days, I would choose to be happy but at times, in a moment of weakness, sadness is a choice because sadness brings me closer to her. But these are fleeting moments and it passes quickly and immediately when I wrote the blog and released the emotions. It does not serve any purpose to anyone. Even I am disgusted with my own depressing words. And rightly so, life moves on. I have also move to another blog. This new blog is about my new life. I am starting on with digital photography - a hobby I picked up late last year. I am going to start to learn to cook - for my children. And I will re-discover old hobby and do new things. Reading, writing, mahjong, golf, bowling, soccer, movies, watching sports programme or whatever - or even re-living old past times like doing mathematical puzzles, exploring philosophy, writing computer programs or even doing nothing. And I should get my bicycle repaired, get a new pair of inline skates and go skating with my kids. Or should I trained for the next marathon? The list is endless. If you care, visit my new blog at: http://simpleman.multiply.com It is pretty bare now there but I will filled it up with my new life. See you there!