Monday, February 14, 2005

Just when I thought how I would be able to pass the day, she called. My heart jumped. She spoke in a strong and firm tone - sounded perfectly OK to me. I asked her why she did not reply to my SMS yesterday and she said that her mobile battery was flat - I knew it was a lie because she SMS the kids. And I wondered what she called me for. Then she asked if "that woman" had called today. I replied no but I said she called the previous day but I did not answer. I told her that I do not want to answer that woman's call. Then she told me to ignore that woman's call and the reason was the that woman was trying to create trouble and hurt our children. And our conversation ended. I was not feeling too good and was fighting hard to stop the tears from flowing. I wondered at the purpose of her call. Who is her to tell me who to talk to and who to meet? I cannot stop her from seeing her lover and yet she wanted to stop me from talking to his wife. Anyway, it meant nothing as I had no intention of taking that woman's call or meeting her. Then E (her friend) SMS me, asking if I was OK. How was I suppose to answer that? I told her I will manage, somehow. And she asked me to be strong, for the kids. And again I felt like crying. Yes, the kids are my inspiration and they will provide the will for me to move on. It was almost 2pm and as I was making my way for the afternoon's meeting, a SMS came in. F SMSed me telling me that she had finished school. I told her to go back herself as I cannot fetch her. She replied OK. Then I told her to be careful when crossing roads and to SMS me when she reach home. And I told her that I love her. It was a senseless meeting as my mind was wandering. And F SMSed me that she had saved some cookies for me at home - something she made in home economics class - for me to try. I felt happy - some valentine cookies from my dearest daughter was enough to brighten an otherwise dull day. The meeting ended and I made my way home.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

hi,

Only have time to read your blog now. U are much better than me. At least u still have 3 kids who love u. I have noone. been through a very lovely valentine day but only to realise that it was just an illusion all this while. Feel so down but I will not give up.

Pls take care.